Decades of hiking adventures in Oregon, Colorado, and all over the Rockies, heavy on photos and laughs, light on fucks given:
"Being the first hiker of the day carries certain responsibilities. You must sweep the entire length of the trail for cobwebs with your face while swearing. Also, you must set out in a jacket that looks psychotically inappropriate to everyone you pass on the way back down in the rising heat. Hey, they weren’t there for the nipple raising at dawn, they can just shut it. As trailblazer, you will enjoy silence and an unlimited selection of guaranteed private peeing spots, a combo more soothing than kittens and Xanax."
--"Beauty of Memaloosian Proportions" May 15, 2017
